Emotions are necessary for successful relationships of all forms as they are how our body communicates our feelings to others.
If we suppress them, we are miscommunication our needs which leads to constant misunderstanding.
Sometimes, our emotions can be like putting together a 1,000-piece jigsaw puzzle.
Most people struggle with expressing their emotions. It's not the easiest thing to do. Some people can talk about their feelings, but for most of us, it's a challenge.
Not only does expressing our emotions make us vulnerable, but it can bring up feelings of inferiority to others as well.
But our emotions are significant parts of ourselves. They help us make decisions. Without them, our lives would be no different from the robots we make or the computers we use
Emotions can also become harmful if we let them rule over us.
How, then, do we balance the good and bad of emotions and express them instead of resisting them?
Try these tips:
1. The first step is to identify your feelings. The sad reality is, that many people seldom investigate their emotions as they occur. We make snap judgments and react impulsively to them without thinking.
● Such emotions tend to hang over us in time, clouding our thoughts and behavior. It’s important to embrace your feelings and reflect on them instead of suppressing them. Take some time to pinpoint how you feel in a given situation.
● Explore those emotions in detail. This action helps in creating a better understanding.
2. Resist the urge to judge your emotions. We tend to jump to conclusions and label our emotions as good or bad. For example, we might begin to feel angry over a situation. But that anger causes us to feel guilty because it seems as if we're irrational.
● You feel sad because some of your friends enjoyed a happy hour on Zoom, and they didn't invite you. And yet, you discard those feelings because doing so doesn't feel like "the right thing to do."
● Instead, you judge your feelings and focus on what you "should" be feeling. Instead of judging your emotions, look through them like a neutral bystander. Avoid trying to make sense of them right away.
● Realize that your feelings are not facts. Because you feel one way does not mean it's the truth. When you resist the urge to judge a feeling, it drops away naturally, and you can express it better.
3. Find ways to express your feelings mindfully and safely. Everyone responds to emotions differently. You may have some strategies that you use, such as journaling, that can help make you feel better.
● Regardless of your method, always focus on expressing them rather than judging yourself for having them. Speak to a friend about them. Write them down. Maybe painting can help you express your emotions.
● Expressing your feelings can help you feel less frustrated, angry, or upset.
4. Practice pausing. When you feel emotions, such as anxiety, anger, frustration, or stress, they often take over your mind. As a result, you might start expressing your feelings by saying something dangerous or lashing out at someone.
● Instead of letting your negative emotions take over, try using some techniques to help you control them. Some methods include pausing and breathing exercises. A few minutes of pausing can give you time to collect your thoughts and calmly make a decision.
● You can also take the time to do some deep breathing or slow, rhythmic breathing to help you calm down and process your anger mindfully.
Remember that emotional outbursts can be dangerous. So, no matter what emotion you're feeling, try to keep calm and practice pausing so that you can express it without resorting to behaviors that you will regret later.
You have the power to express your emotions and set your boundaries honestly and with grace it just takes commitment and practice.